Written by: Jamie

Hello, my little gingersnaps! How’s it hanging? How’s your weekend going? You ready to get started? I know I am…

Kim Kardashian Wants To Convince You Her Toddler Posted This Bikini Photo

North must be REALLY phone savvy.

“North posted this while playing games on my phone,” said Kardashian in her caption. “Not sure why or how she chose it, but I’m not complaining!”

Source: HuffingtonPost

Sure, Kim. I’m sure your toddler “while playing games on your phone”, opened your Instagram app, then went through your photos, picked that one, and posted it. Next you’re going to tell us you don’t retouch your selfies.

Naked Oregon Burglar Crawls Into Bed With Couple, Discovers Man Has Gun

An Oregon man was arrested Thursday after he broke into a Portland home, stripped naked, crawled into bed with the couple who live there and kissed the man — who turned out to have a gun — police said.

An incident report says Defeudis broke into the home about 3:40 a.m. (6:40 a.m. ET) Thursday and began gathering items of value.

He then removed all of his clothes and climbed into bed with the unidentified man and woman who live there — and for some reason kissed the man, it says.

The man woke up to find the burglar sitting on top of him, holding a knife, police said. When the man pulled a gun, the burglar hurriedly put on his pants and fled — chased by the now fully awake man, who fired three shots but missed, according to the report.

Source: NBCNews

So this guy breaks into the house, gathers up the valuables, see the man and wife in bed asleep and decides to strip off his clothes, straddle the man (with a knife) and kiss him. What was he expecting? A threesome?? The homeowner had a gun, pulled it out and the burglar ran. The homeowner fired three shots and missed.

Hey Dufus, you’re welcome to try that at my house but guess what?

I won’t miss.