I know, I know: your parents aren’t cool. Their hobbies are strange and their friends are even stranger. Your mother collects Limoges and your father cleans the house twice a day, including the weird brown stains under the dog’s eyes (they’re called tear stains, Dad, and they’re easily fixed). Come to think of it, though, those are my parents. Maybe yours are uncool in totally different ways. I don’t know.
But listen: Father’s Day is coming up, and this is the perfect time that we had a little chat about your parents. See, the thing is, your parents aren’t as boring as you think. Even though you may think they’re lame, eventually you’ll come to appreciate the little intricacies about your parents that make them distinctly who they are; and you’ll find that you’re not so different so be careful how much you make fun of them.
Sure, they’re from the generation that wrecked the environment, and the economy, and maybe your fragile sense of self-worth (wait, sorry, now we’re talking about me again). But they’re also from the generation that invented fantasy sports, back when you had to score it all by hand (that’s dedication!).
And sure, maybe they’re fat, but the next time you wear your fancy climbing, hiking, or hunting gear, you can thank your parents’ generation for revolutionizing utility and comfort in outdoor gear. Theodore Roosevelt didn’t have any Gore-Tex, buddy.
Your parents may listen to some weird music now, but back in the day, the Baby Boomers were changing everything we know about music. We’ve got more genres and geniuses than ever now, but back when all you had was country, jazz, classical, and rockabilly, Mom and Dad’s crew invented dozens of new types of rock and roll and imported dozens more from countries around the world. You’ve heard of Woodstock, right?
So, look, I get it. You’ll still be buying a nose hair trimmer for Dad’s birthday. Mom will still send you the name of the exact cosmetic product that she wants for hers, and then she won’t even pretend to be surprised when she opens it. They’ll still watch Jimmy Fallon instead of Stephen Colbert and they’ll still eat Oreos right after walking for fifteen minutes on the treadmill and they’ll still talk about Millennials as though they’re some kind of infectious disease (I’m right here, Mom). But when you’re losing your patience, just remember: your parents were a part of some big changes in our little world.
So do them a favor and remember that they’re a whole lot more interesting than they may seem at first glance. You wouldn’t want people to forget about smartphones and health care breakthroughs and that time you ran the table in fantasy football just because you get old someday and spend all your time yelling at kids to get off your lawn. Do your parents the same favor. And when it comes to that nose hair trimmer for Dad, go with a nice brand name.
