Me: Hey did you hear they are saying that men who have big balls make crappy fathers?
Brian: Who is this “they” everyone talks about? Ever think of that?
Me: Crazy people.
Brian: Okay, I’ll go with that.
Me: So, would you say your balls are big or small?
Brian: Um, I guess they would be about average? Wait, no…you tell me!
Me: So that would make you a mediocre dad.
Me: Actually, thinking about it now, what is the “ideal” ball size? Penis size gets all the attention. You never hear someone bragging about their big balls. Overworked and under-appreciated….
Me: Hah! Wait, stop trying to change the subject, I’m still confused. Ever guy wants a big penis, but not big balls? Why?
Brian: Well, because that would make us crappy fathers.